Let’s Be Honest

To be honest, you have to think outside the box because what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger and besides, you can’t have your cake and eat it too, because as we all know when the going gets tough, the tough get going while I plan to give it 110 percent because the fact of the matter is that it’s as clear as the nose on your face, that if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck and at the end of the day, when it’s all said and done, there’s no reason to cry over spilt milk just because you’ve closed the barn door after the cows left, and to be perfectly honest and with all due respect, one man’s ceiling is another man’s floor and I warn you that the grass is always greener on the other side while that line of thought begs the question about why the cat got your tongue, if you are dressed to kill and whether the better strategy is to avoid it like the plague. And by the way, eat shit and die.

I did it and strung a lot of words together while making absolutely no sense, all the while appearing to make sense, something like the Jabberwock or a more modern example, Spiro T. Agnew and his nabobs of negativism. Cliches are another of my banes as they let people blather on as if they know things when all they really know are cliches that require no more thought than a squirrel pondering another nut. Kind of like the definition of a locally elected official.

These days, there is no shortage of cliches and two of the worst that make me gag and cause me to run down any street screaming is “woke” and “cancel culture.” It seems that everybody is woke and that is about the worst 2021 insult you can hurl but what does “woke” mean and I’m not referring to the thing you do when you open your eyes from a long night’s sleep. Politicians seem to be great purveyors of cliches like “woke” and I am very curious about how it gained that imperial status of the cliches to end all cliches at least for today.

There’s a Facebook posting that regales all the progress made by liberals and all the roadblocks thrown up by conservatives, especially these days. So this is the response of one area politician, who leans so far to the right that it’s amazing he doesn’t fall and break his Trumpian noggin.

“And now Liberals have yielded to Leftist and the Woke mob,” the politician said and note he capitalized “woke” meaning what? I thought only proper names and places are capitalized so is woke a city in Ohio or is it the middle name of the country’s 12th president, whoever he was. This is how the dictionary defines woke:

“Being ‘woke’ refers to being aware of and typically feeling outraged by the suffering of the marginalised in society for the benefit of the privileged . Having knowledge of the effects of the patriarchy, racism, classism and homophobia are examples of ‘woke’ behavior.”

Sounds like a compliment to me so why does the right twist it in pieces to make it sound like some lethal assault on all that is good, right and American? Because they are upturning rocks in search of new ways to assault anyone who is actually good, right and American.

And then there’s another bottom dweller of cliches, “cancel culture.”

I think it means criticizing groups of people because of their actions, like, using cancel culture to blot out the likes of Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, Sen. Ted Cruz, Sen. Josh Hawley, Sen. Tom Cotton, Rudy Giuliani, Rep. Jim Jordan and the king of them all, Agent Orange. Each cries he or she is the innocent, powerless and pathetic victim of cancel culture and I would cancel them all if I could, of course, in a figurative way and I would deserve a medal or 20 if I could. For the record, cancel culture is defined as: The practice or tendency of engaging in mass canceling as a way of expressing disapproval and exerting social pressure; also the people who engage in or support this practice.”

And so I leave you with these sage words: It may be time to abandon ship, take an about face and act above board while seeking the ace in the hole and realizing that indeed, absence makes the heart grow fonder and that of course, absolute power corrupts absolutely although the acid test is whether the Achilles heel is to blame because, truly, the acorn doesn’t fall far from the tree and as we all well know, actions speak louder than words and it really is in poor taste to air dirty laundry particularly if you are all dressed up and nowhere to go so just trust that things will work out all in due time if you are not all over the map and really accept that all that glitters is not gold, that all is fair in love and war and hopefully you won’t always be a bridesmaid and never the bride if you always look on the bright side and take to heart that an idle mind is the devil’s playground. Shoot me.

Journalist for 40 years and now a creative writer