No Supper for You
Go to Your Rooms, Ron DeSantis, Anthony Sabatini and Chip Roy
Just stop it and you go to your room and no supper for you until you stop misbehaving. I don’t care if you starve, just stop it. As far as I’m concerned, if you never ate again it would be your just desserts (pun intended). What have I done to raise such deviate children? I tried to raise you right but you grew up so spoiled rotten and you completely refuse to be held accountable for your actions. You think the world owes you something and that you can just take, take and then take some more and give nothing back. That’s one thing my father taught me, to be responsible and honest and not to hurt others, and yes that’s more than one thing. You brats know who you are.
I don’t know about you but I’ve been having trouble falling asleep because of the news that global warming is so bad that it’s like a freight train with no brakes and that the worst wildfires in California history, the inferno settling into Greece are just the beginning and as the climate panelists say, “You ain’t heard nothing yet.” And these smug, self-important, delusional children who we have given authority over us are playing childish games to satisfy their infantile needs while the world is literally going up in smoke but you know what, they aren’t children and they aren’t adults and I guess they are more like swarming insects that bite the dickens out of you and make you go crazy scratching. Maybe we need to give them all a good dousing of “Raid Off Deep Woods” or maybe we can lace their Daiquaris with DEET (diethyltoluamide) which is the most popular bug spray ingredient due to its effectiveness at protecting from ticks, mosquitoes, other bugs, and all the diseases they carry. It’s probably not good for humans but you don’t have to worry about that.
Ah, here’s the big question: If we have to resign to the sobering fact that the world is moving toward one big charcoal briquet, then what do we do? Buy more beef, or marshmallows? It’s like they forgot to turn the gas off. Or they are driving the school bus and they have no licenses and they think they can just go as fast as they want, making it very uncomfortable to the children on the bus. Or maybe they are just so dumb that they don’t know that gas can kill you and that breaks on a bus are very necessary to everyone’s safety and well being. Even worse is that they very well know that you can suffocate from gas and they are very much aware that a bus without brakes is really bad.
Maybe no dinner will teach you a lesson but I’m not sure, one thing I do know is that you can’t mess with people’s lives. Rep. Anthony Sabatini, R-Fla., someone thankfully I have never heard of before, has filed legislation to name a Florida highway after Donald Trump. You go to your room and don’t come out until I say so. The earth is moving toward broil oven temperature and you want to name a highway after an evil schmo who tried to overturn the government. Just go to your room and I don’t want to see you and maybe I’ll just get my belt or maybe I’ll just feed you liver or maybe I’ll buy ice cream and make you watch while I eat it all.
There’s a name for people like you, it’s jerk, stupid, feckless, thoughtless and just not worth the paper you’re written on and I apologize for mixing metaphors and for citing more than just one name. Just tell me one thing: How do you sleep at night, how do you look your children in the eye, how do you face your mother and yes that’s more than one thing but you deserve every one of them. And the last thing I’ll say right to your bloated face is “have you no shame, have you no remorse, no pudency to the treachery you have wrought?”
That’s not the last thing. The last thing is that a major new United Nations scientific report has concluded there is a short, tiny window to prevent true Armageddon and if you dolts don’t understand that word, it means the end of the world as we know it.
You idiots, open your eyes, this summer alone, horrendous heat waves have killed hundreds of people in the United States and Canada, gargantuan floods have devastated Germany and China, and wildfires have raged out of control in Siberia, Turkey and Greece and of course, the second largest wildfire in California history is still cooking.
The N.Y. Times reported that even if nations started sharply cutting emissions today, total global warming is likely to rise around 1.5 degrees Celsius within the next two decades, “a hotter future that is now essentially locked in.”
With great leadership humanity can avoid the worst by a coordinate effort among the nations of the earth to stop adding carbon dioxide to the atmosphere by around 2050. That would likely halt and level off global warming at around 1.5 degrees so the worst that could happen is that “Nearly 1 billion people worldwide could swelter in more frequent life-threatening heat waves. Hundreds of millions more would struggle for water because of severe droughts. Some animal and plant species alive today will be gone. Coral reefs, which sustain fisheries for large swaths of the globe, will suffer more frequent mass die-offs.” That’s not that bad. If our great leaders continue to fail us we all might as well just jump off that cliff with the other lemmings.
Did I say leaders?
Florida Republican Gov. Ron DeSantis is leading although it isn’t a fight against global warming, it’s a fight to stop the government from mandating masks to fight the growing spread of COVID-19. And Rep. Chip Roy, R-Texas, is leading a holy campaign to stop teachers from teaching the effects of slavery on America. Sorry Ron and Chip, no food for you until 2031, no ice cream ever, no TV, no games, no nothing and I wouldn’t punish you so harshly if I thought you could both repent but I’m sorry for you and me and the rest of us because repent is not part of your vocabulary. Jerks. Sweet dreams.