The Penceman and the President
Nothing Really Here
I’m not quite certain about Mike Pence, but I do know he is not a real person and that possibly he is a cardboard cutout or he may be made of paper mache or wood and maybe he was created by one of those 3-D printers and these assumptions are based on the fact that I don’t believe that Mike Pence ever had an original thought which means he may just be a plastic figurine that has a strange kind of voice machine implanted in him and it is programmed to make it sound like he’s real. He is certainly not pensive, although you’d think someone named Pence would be pensive. I mean he wouldn’t even have dinner with another woman or attend events without alcohol without his wife, Karen, and he was all in on Bill Clinton’s presidential impeachment because Clinton’s “bad moral habits” can “incinerate the planet” and that nothing less than a president who represents “all of our highest hopes and ideals and values” could be accepted and that is why Pence supported trump.
Really.
This is what Pence said on Fox yesterday, regarding the foiled coup d’etat at the Capitol on Jan. 6, and keep in mind that trump had egged the rabble on the hang Biden because he wouldn’t do trump’s bidding and illegally cancel the 2020 presidential election and declare trump the leader.:
“I know the media wants to distract from the Biden administration’s failed agenda by focusing on one day in January,” said Pence. “They want to use that one day to try and demean the character and intentions of 74 million Americans who believed we could be strong again and prosperous again and supported our administration in 2016 and 2020.”
And this is what CNN had to say about the Penceman: “Pence has a long and often cringeworthy record of devotion. As conservative columnist George Will noted in 2018, his stomach-turning sycophancy made him ‘America’s most repulsive political figure.’ But toadyism is what saved Pence from political oblivion when he was a middling governor of a state, Indiana, that rarely sees the national spotlight.”
I couldn’t say it better and that is why I am not a columnist for the Washington Post.
And on the subject of morality and science, Pence has criticized comprehensive sex education and said that “condoms are a very, very poor protection against sexually transmitted diseases,” that Congress should “oppose any effort to recognize homosexuals as a ‘discrete and insular minority’ entitled to the protection of anti-discrimination laws similar to those extended to women and ethnic minorities” and that “global warming is a myth” as “the earth is actually cooler today than it was about 50 years ago” and that he believed “with all my heart that God created the heavens and the earth, the seas and all that is in them. How he did that, I’ll ask him about some day” and that “… I also believe that someday scientists will come to see that only the theory of intelligent design provides even a remotely rational explanation for the known universe.”
The guy is a nut and not even really a guy.
It’s hard to find something likable about Pence although the fly that nested on his white hair during the vice presidential debate seemed to be quite content. Pence is considering a run the presidency in 2024, if trump allows it, but I would be afraid that if he was faced with a difficult presidential decision and was pondering the fate of the world too close to the presidential fireplace that he would melt like the wax puppet that he is. He seems to be controlled by anyone in his immediate sphere, such as trump and Pence’s wife, Karen, who once taught at John Strange Elementary School in Indianapolis, Ind., and I don’t believe that is really a school and she started a small business named “‘That’s My Towel!’ Charm” which makes metal charms for attaching to towels so they can be more easily identified when among others. That is vital.
When he was vice president, Trump named Pence the chairman of the White House Coronavirus Task Force, which was established in response to the COVID-19 pandemic in the United States, and that really worked out well and then Pence did not buckle under the intense trumpian pressure and refused to overturn Biden’s election and then nudged on by trump, supporters threatened Pence with violence during the storming of the U.S. Capitol, for not trying to overturn the election results. Pence even withstood the trumpian heat when trump told pence that “You can either go down in history as a patriot, or you can go down in history as a pussy” and that word “pussy” has come up before in relation with Gen. Bone Spurs. It did get a bit dicey for the once and never again vice president, after a trump lawyer and fellow nut job, L. Lin Wood, called for Pence to be “executed” by “firing squad.” And lately Wood has taken to the Fox airwaves to insist that the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks never had and that the twin towers were shot down by U.S. missiles.
Pence also once had a radio talk show on station WRCR-FM in Rushville, Ind., where he called himself “Rush Limbaugh on decaf” but he cancelled the show after two years to run for Congress in 2000 and lose but also because most people fell asleep while listening to “Rush Limbaugh on decaf” and maybe they would have stayed awake if they had enough caffeine.
When he was sworn in as vice president on Jan. 20, 2017, Pence read from 2 Chronicles 7:14, “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”
I rest my case and hope that whatever planet sent us Pence will show themselves so we can give them a real talking to.